To End The Drought

Sitting down in front of the keys, a thousand thoughts go through my head. I think of ISIS, of little girls with books, of insane people conflating Christianity with "God on America's Side," of chocolate bunnies, of frightening droughts, of lying billionaires moving suited pawns across legislatures...

I think of my bank account, of my aching foot, of the fact that my computer is on its last leg, of the fact that capitalism doesn't work well for people with my kind of motivation and values...

I think of all the flaws and the fears of the world in the span of a moment. They flash before my mind's eye. It is a dizzying, horrifying, freak show, and I really don't recommend it. It's vomit inducing.

I could write about any single one of these things, and while they each could be twisted into a faith post, the reality is together, they mean so much more.

The world is scary. It is dark. It is full of awful, terrible, no good things. People use the same ideology and evidence to support their views, often with selfish aims, and with complete disregard for the consequences if they win their arguments.

In this season of Lent, I have to remind myself, and you, that it is darkest just before the dawn. All of these things are true...are present...and they must be addressed. You must decide what to do with the chocolate bunny, and how to re-landscape your lawn because grass is not going to work any more. These are bitter pills for the average Californian (and the rest of the US). You must decide how to address your faith - and work, or not, with others across the world to bring about Shalom - that yearned state of the Divine.

And for us Christians, yes, these things weigh on us, and it is hard and scary and we want to hide our faces under our pillows and stay in our cozy beds. But Jesus still died a horrible death...and returned.

As my father likes to quote, in his best imitation of a whooping preacher...

"It's Good Friday...BUT EASTER'S COMIN'!"

One more time...

"It's Good Friday...BUT EASTER IS COMIN'!"

We are not alone. In the midst of the faithful, is a large bubbling, untapped wellspring of love and light. It is time to end the drought.

Rush forth my brothers and sisters - come forward - your time in now.

The Blessing of Pride: Churches Coming Out

Last night I attended a little panel discussion at my church given by Pacific Pride. There were a few things that stood out about the panel to me.

First, the panelists all had some connection to faith. Generally this was something in the past (and had left scars) and more rarely, it was something in the present.

Second, there were only two panelists who were around my age (actually younger), and the rest were significantly older. The point was made throughout the evening that experiences of LGBTQ people are divided generationally. The experiences of the older panelists were radically different from the younger ones, and certainly different compared to the experiences of my LGBTQ friends.

Third, there was a theme of self exploration and the encouragement of self exploration, not only in relation to personal gender identity, but across the board (As an INFJ personality, I can't agree more!).

And finally, there was a theme of coming out and welcoming.

This last one is what I really want to talk about because it points to several issues in the church. While the panelists asserted that no church should have to "come out" in support of any group of people (see: the message of Jesus), without this act, the very people a church seeks to help will be unwelcome.

In other words, a church must take an open stand, or come out, in order to be recognized as a welcoming place.

There are so many churches in this world that do not take stands on issues. If a person were to call and ask a "closeted" church if they were welcoming of a given group of people, it is hard to know how they would respond. The reality is, most people wouldn't ask, and it isn't their responsibility to ask.

The Church is meant to be a witness to the world. The Church is meant to declare its stances to the world and defend them, regardless of what other people and institutions think. Inevitably this gets individual churches and the Church as a whole into trouble, but that is what Jesus requires us to do. Sometimes, you just need to flip a table. Sometimes you need to call a person out.

My church in Goleta (or rather my dad's church as I'm slightly transient) has yet to take a stand on this. Part of me understands why the community has been dragging its feet (think: denominational BS). Part. Most of me has no idea why they haven't just come out yet. I mean, how can you have 3 openly gay staff members over the years and NOT openly stand up for them?! That's crazy! 

My only guess is it is fear - fear about the unknown - about what will happen if they make a stand. But here's the thing: fear isn't a good enough reason to stop from doing something. Jesus tells us not to be afraid. God tells us not to be afraid, but to step out in faith, and act according to God's will. All God's children deserve love, community, welcoming, and nurturing.

I don't think there's any question here - it's time to come out.

Atheists Worship Satan and Other Myths

I get that a lot of people don't care for religion. After all, it is an institution. Institutions are created by people. People are flawed and therefore, their creations are flawed. Combine this with the fact institutions are often interested in self-preservation and such pursuits rarely benefit people, and yes, it makes sense. Hating religion makes sense to me.

Hell. Even I hate religion sometimes. And I'm a believer.

That said, it drives me CRAZY when generalizations are made about religion - especially statements about it being dumb, irrelevant, hateful, or obnoxious. There are people who are part of all institutions who fit these categories. There are groups within all institutions that fit these categories. All people in a given institution cannot be dumb, useless, etc. The law of statistics asserts it cannot be so. If we lump every person and group together, things get dangerous (you know, like Holocaust dangerous).

It also drives me crazy when people assume the logical counter to religion is atheism (though philosophically it may be), and then proceed to associate the 'Devil' with this mode of thinking.

Note: If you believe in the Devil, you cannot be atheist. Atheism is, by definition, the belief that there is no god - none of any kind. The Devil would qualify as a deity or god in this situation. People who worship Satan are actually Satan worshippers or Devil worshippers. They aren't even Satanists who are more closely related to atheists...but that is another discussion entirely...

I say all this because someone - I think an attendee to my brother's wedding - decided to leave a confused note on the comment card at my parents' church. It was probably a confused teen, because I hope no thoughtful person over 30 would waste a non-profit organization's resources by leaving a confused anti-religious comment on a card while attending a wedding.

Too bad that person hadn't been raised in a church. Maybe they would have been a little more respectful to the community who spent time and money on communication materials.

All God's Children

God doesn't make imperfect babies. That's the gist.

I love babies. I have one of my own. He's sleeping next to me and he is, by and large, perfect. Really. Everyone says so - I'm not joking. I could talk about him all day, but that's not the point. The point is that my baby isn't the only kind out there.

Some babies are born with six fingers. Some are born with an extra chromosome. Some are born missing a chromosome. Some are born without feet. Some are born with pale skin. Some are born with curly hair. Some are born with no hair. Some are born with double joints.

Actually, the possibilities are endless. Even the really horrible ones - like congenital heart defects or spina bifida or a thousand other really awful nail-biting complications....

You know, some babies even have ambiguous genitals.

The fault here isn't with God. A lot of religious people have said it before and I'll say it again - God's creation is beautiful. We're a part of that creation. Everyone. No matter where the person is on whatever spectrum you can name - that person is a part of God's creation.

Part of that creation is experience and human engagement. I think that's part of why we're here on Earth - so that we can be a part of this wonderful beautiful thing. That means sometimes humans must act. God requires us to act. So if that means that some baby was born to feel more female than male and needs to act to engage with creation... then do it. Do it up. Do it beautifully in concert with God. That's God's will.

I can talk about how the Southern Baptists have completely missed the point and are basically denying the existence of the gray inbetween area - that confusing beautiful mess of God's creation. I could talk about how they're trying to redefine standard English word usage and that's the most bullshit ridiculous impossible thing. I can talk about how they're pretending to love when what they're really doing is contributing to self-hatred, depression, and psychological scars that traumatize the marginalized groups of our society. But I won't. I don't think there's any question about all those things and plenty of other people will discuss them.

The only thing I want to make sure people get is the fact that some Baptists think something different. In fact a whole lot of CHRISTIANS think and believe something completely different: God's messy technicolor creation requires human engagement and when that happens, it is rendered even more beautiful. The world is a richer more wonderful place because of difference, and I for one, welcome it.

"Religion is for the Strong" or "Jesus the Bad-ass"

You're probably wondering how I could possibly have this title when I'm a Christian.

I'm not saying that only "strong" people can be people of faith - those perfect people who seem to have everything together and do everything right (i.e. 2.5 kids, dog, white picket fence, personal trainer and a 3 course meal every night). I'm not refuting Jesus' message of "blessed are the meek" or "blessed are the poor." I'm saying you really can't be religious without accepting the fact that religion will challenge you. Challenge is hard. Challenge requires determination and persistence.

This challenge comes in the form of asking tough questions (such as really engaging Jesus' messages and questioning how they can be applied in our lives) and requiring counter-culture actions (such as protesting unjust legislation or helping to build sustainable communities for the poor).

You can't be weak-minded and be a person of faith - not if you're truly a person of faith.

I don't mean that a person who has struggled in life and has been beaten down wouldn't be able to be a person of faith. In fact, that person, tempered and honed by experience is probably more likely to be strong in faith than not. Having your faith regularly tested is kind of like leveling up in a video game - every fight becomes an easy win after a while.

Strength comes in many different forms, but the kind that is required for faith and commitment to a community like a church requires some serious thought and engagement with scripture.

I've been saying these kinds of things for years, but it's nice to read some others' words echoing my own feelings on the subject. It seems a lot of people who are currently atheist became atheist because the Church made a mistake. They dumbed-down the message of the gospel. They pandered. They sold-out. However you want to put it, they stopped pushing the strong counter-culture message of Jesus and started putting up some kind of "Buddy Christ" idea for mass consumption, thinking this would be more attractive.

But Buddy Christ is a joke. No one respects this guy.

My Jesus is the Jesus who called authorities on the carpet with quick thinking. My Jesus is the Jesus who made a whip and chased the money lenders out of the temple and flipped their tables. My Jesus is the one who spent time with the people who were the least valued by society and showed them compassion and love. My Jesus is the Jesus who said rich people can't go to heaven because they're too attached to their things.

My Jesus is a bad-ass. He might piss you off. He might humiliate you in front of your peers. He might cry openly in front of hundreds of people. But whatever he does, he does it completely.

That's a guy I can get behind - a guy people respect.

This is the message, the focus the Church needs to return to. And it pisses people off. It makes people uncomfortable. But here's the thing - it's the only way for the Church to be. This is how you build a community - not by making things easy, but by expecting more from people.

Think about your favorite teacher in school. It wasn't the guy who put movies on all the time and then gave you worksheets to fill out. It was the person who demanded more from you - who asked you tough questions and forced you to do things you never would have otherwise. It was the teacher who called you to his or her desk after class and talked to you - asking you point blank why you weren't doing your best. And honestly this was the class you wanted to come to every day - not the worksheet/movie class.

The Church needs to be like our favorite teachers. We need to embrace Jesus the Bad-ass and share him with everyone around us. We need to ask tough questions and call people on the carpet when they're not doing their best. We need to try things we've never tried before...and then, only then, will we truly reflect the Kingdom of God.

Catty Church Musicians - Taking The Ego Out of Church Music

It has been some time since I posted to this blog. Partially this was because I didn't know what I would say. Partially because I hadn't found a church. Well, I have a church now and it has given me some fresh perspectives on the issues that face theologically progressive communities.

Most recently my inspiration came from singing a Sara Groves song. I'm part of the worship design team. We planned this song to emphasize the sermon and scripture that day. Well, my guitarist and I decided to get up early and soundcheck before everyone got there. Church starts at 10, so we thought 8 would be perfect. Choir doesn't practice until 8:30. The organist was practicing from 8 til 8:30 without stopping. He didn't ask why we were there, even though it was clear. He basically ignored us. Then, while we were waiting,  the bell choir started coming in.

Yes, they have a bell choir. No, I don't know what that's about.

My guitarist had laid his gigbag on the front pew and I had left my purse there. It should be noted there are 2 large pews, 1 on either side of the aisle.

The director of the bell choir looked at our things which took up barely half of the 1 pew and informed us this was where they usually put their bell cases. When we asked if they typically used the other pew, we were informed we could use part of that side. It should be noted, there is an entrance on either side and the center of the dais where the bells would be. Either side would be sufficiently useful, no one spot being better than another.

Once they started moving things, the choir members actually walked between my guitarist and I when our music stands etc were set up. We were standing less than an arm length from one another. Somehow they felt it was acceptable to behave this way.

Maybe this rudeness had to do with the fact these individuals and groups are established contributors to worship. Perhaps they think highly of themselves. Maybe they're so comfortable they're oblivious to the impact and nature of their actions.

Yet, I'm here to tell you it doesn't fricking matter.

When someone is preparing to share their gift, they should be given respect. If a person doesn't do this everyday, they should be given even more support because frequently this person is less comfortable and confidant than a veteran performer.

I have to say, I was really disappointed. I don't sing for myself in church. I mean, I love it, but I don't do it for me. I do it because I want the congregation to have another thing to think about - another way to nourish their spirits. It's very disheartening to feel so unsupported by the congregation you're trying to serve.

Now, I should be clear. I didn't feel the general congregation was unsupportive, or the pastor. Actually, many of those individuals were very sweet and appreciative. Mostly I felt a coldness from my fellow musicians. You might think this bizarre. Frankly, I do too.

I am writing this post to remind us all of one thing - we're here for the same reasons, or we should be. These are:

1. To praise God

2. To glorify God

3. To nourish our collective spirits

And maybe even..

4. To play some good music with friends

5. To have fun

Any other reasons, particularly involving the ego, are a cancer in a congregation and should be stamped out immediately. I'm not interested in the kind of drama that comes with egos. There is no time for that. So, if your church is in a similar spot, I'd recommend sitting down and having a chat. Post haste. You'll be glad you did.

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Big Stuck #7 - Sunday Christianity

There are 2 sides to this dinar - those who only are Christian on Sundays and those who say you can only be Christian if you go to Church on Sundays... *sigh*