Silence is Poison: I'm Talking Now

This has taken a lot of thought - a long time and much consideration. There are so many issues in our country and our world, I struggled to decide what to write - what focus was most needed here.

So here it is... the hard bitter truth.

It is easy for me to sit here, in the comfort of my parents' house, and make pronouncements about the state of the world. For the time being, I have food, a bed, a roof, and a loving family. I have education. I live everyday with consolidated power and resources that others fantasize about. I live in a place that is the perfect temperature most of the year. The ocean is minutes away. Flowers bloom all year. The sun shines.

It would be easy to sit here and ignore everything. It would be easy to get roped into ideas about prosperity being a heavenly mandate. It would be easy to forget about the other difficult parts of my life, to let them fade into memory, and ignore their lessons. It would be easy to forget my beautiful students from Oakland, or the farm workers down the road, or the women and children in shelters downtown. It would be easy.

I could ignore murders, rapes, molestations, homelessness, and unemployment. I could ignore victim blaming and the consolidation of power and resources by the wealthy. I could ignore rich white Christians getting hot and bothered about marriage equality, while people are dying in the streets and poor children go without food or shelter.

I could ignore these things, and eat a three course meal every night on china. I could drink expensive mixed drinks and wear designer clothing and party like everything was fun and fancy-free. I could.

And if I did, what would I be? Not Christian. That is for sure. No, I would be the embodiment of sin. I would be evil.

It is our responsibility, no matter how privileged we are, to stand with our sisters and brothers. It is our responsibility to expand access to education and health care. It is our responsibility to expand the possibility of love and friendship. It is our responsibility to serve one another and give voice to the voiceless. It is our responsibility to shed light on the places of shadow in our society.

Do not be fooled. God does not want us to stand with the law when the law protects privilege. God does not want us to stand with power when that power is one of oppression.

And this is uncomfortable. God requires us to get uncomfortable. That means, accepting the fact that yes - men are the most dangerous threat to women.  That means accepting the fact that yes - white people have systematically oppressed minorities for centuries. That means accepting the fact that yes -  our entire American society, law, culture, and businesses, are structured to funnel more power and resources to the rich.

When we accept these things as true, the whole game changes. The conversation shifts. And then the question becomes, what are you going to do about it?
There are three options:

1. Keep quiet. Do nothing, which means you are for the current situation.
2. Actively support the current situation (i.e. punish people for being poor, kill black men and women, punish women for being women, punish gay people for being gay...).
3. Or you can protest. You can write. You can fight. You can share alternative news narratives. You can educate yourself on how to be an ally to those with less of a voice, those with less privilege, and fewer rights.

I denied this call for many years. I denied it, and with it, a part of myself. I stayed silent, and it was an evil thing. I made myself sick. I was the worst kind of sinner, and for that, I beg your forgiveness.

It is for all these reasons that I wrote my story in THRIVE. It is a small story, in a large network of stories. There are so many people who have endured worse. There are so many people who were never given the chance to speak. It is for them I reveal myself. It is for them, I do the thing I was called to do - to be vulnerable. I might not be able to protest in Baltimore, or volunteer at Planned Parenthood, or All Out, or aggressively lobby for income-based penalties.

But I can do this.

#silenceispoison
#imtalkingnow
#THRIVE 

The Blessing of Pride: Churches Coming Out

Last night I attended a little panel discussion at my church given by Pacific Pride. There were a few things that stood out about the panel to me.

First, the panelists all had some connection to faith. Generally this was something in the past (and had left scars) and more rarely, it was something in the present.

Second, there were only two panelists who were around my age (actually younger), and the rest were significantly older. The point was made throughout the evening that experiences of LGBTQ people are divided generationally. The experiences of the older panelists were radically different from the younger ones, and certainly different compared to the experiences of my LGBTQ friends.

Third, there was a theme of self exploration and the encouragement of self exploration, not only in relation to personal gender identity, but across the board (As an INFJ personality, I can't agree more!).

And finally, there was a theme of coming out and welcoming.

This last one is what I really want to talk about because it points to several issues in the church. While the panelists asserted that no church should have to "come out" in support of any group of people (see: the message of Jesus), without this act, the very people a church seeks to help will be unwelcome.

In other words, a church must take an open stand, or come out, in order to be recognized as a welcoming place.

There are so many churches in this world that do not take stands on issues. If a person were to call and ask a "closeted" church if they were welcoming of a given group of people, it is hard to know how they would respond. The reality is, most people wouldn't ask, and it isn't their responsibility to ask.

The Church is meant to be a witness to the world. The Church is meant to declare its stances to the world and defend them, regardless of what other people and institutions think. Inevitably this gets individual churches and the Church as a whole into trouble, but that is what Jesus requires us to do. Sometimes, you just need to flip a table. Sometimes you need to call a person out.

My church in Goleta (or rather my dad's church as I'm slightly transient) has yet to take a stand on this. Part of me understands why the community has been dragging its feet (think: denominational BS). Part. Most of me has no idea why they haven't just come out yet. I mean, how can you have 3 openly gay staff members over the years and NOT openly stand up for them?! That's crazy! 

My only guess is it is fear - fear about the unknown - about what will happen if they make a stand. But here's the thing: fear isn't a good enough reason to stop from doing something. Jesus tells us not to be afraid. God tells us not to be afraid, but to step out in faith, and act according to God's will. All God's children deserve love, community, welcoming, and nurturing.

I don't think there's any question here - it's time to come out.

Is SCOTUS for Discrimination?

I know you wanted to read my response to the SCOTUS Hobby Lobby ruling. I'm slow...so here it finally is:

I thank God every day for separation of church and state. I also thank God for how blessed  I am to live in a place where I am not discriminated against (so says the law) because of my religious beliefs. I mean, you can be Sikh in our army and wear a full beard and a turban. That's awesome!

I'm also thankful that I live in a place that my opinions (and therefore beliefs) are protected in the public space.

Have you seen the problem yet? I'm a little surprised the majority of the justices didn't.

By saying that companies can impose their religious beliefs on their workers through health insurance, we have opened up the doors to a mess of issues.

What if someone eats beef? Must they stop if they work for a Hindu? What if someone needs a blood transfusion? Must they find alternative treatments if they work for a Jehovah's Witness? What if a woman needs hormonal birth control to treat other health issues and works for some place like Hobby Lobby? What if a woman needs a dead fetus removed from her womb? Is that not covered when she works for certain Christian organizations?!

And this doesn't stop there. Since this is my faith blog, I won't touch the fact the Supreme Court is attacking female reproductive rights and female health yet again...

The issue we need to discuss here is the erosion of nondiscrimination. Necessarily individuals will choose to apply to other employment. While this is not technically discrimination, it is in fact. It facilitates work environments that are not friendly to diverse employee demographics. It facilitates segregation. This is counter to the spirit of America.

There is, to put it mildly, no way in Hell I will ever work for nor support Hobby Lobby. Ever. Period.

And as for SCOTUS? I'll pray for wisdom.

All God's Children

God doesn't make imperfect babies. That's the gist.

I love babies. I have one of my own. He's sleeping next to me and he is, by and large, perfect. Really. Everyone says so - I'm not joking. I could talk about him all day, but that's not the point. The point is that my baby isn't the only kind out there.

Some babies are born with six fingers. Some are born with an extra chromosome. Some are born missing a chromosome. Some are born without feet. Some are born with pale skin. Some are born with curly hair. Some are born with no hair. Some are born with double joints.

Actually, the possibilities are endless. Even the really horrible ones - like congenital heart defects or spina bifida or a thousand other really awful nail-biting complications....

You know, some babies even have ambiguous genitals.

The fault here isn't with God. A lot of religious people have said it before and I'll say it again - God's creation is beautiful. We're a part of that creation. Everyone. No matter where the person is on whatever spectrum you can name - that person is a part of God's creation.

Part of that creation is experience and human engagement. I think that's part of why we're here on Earth - so that we can be a part of this wonderful beautiful thing. That means sometimes humans must act. God requires us to act. So if that means that some baby was born to feel more female than male and needs to act to engage with creation... then do it. Do it up. Do it beautifully in concert with God. That's God's will.

I can talk about how the Southern Baptists have completely missed the point and are basically denying the existence of the gray inbetween area - that confusing beautiful mess of God's creation. I could talk about how they're trying to redefine standard English word usage and that's the most bullshit ridiculous impossible thing. I can talk about how they're pretending to love when what they're really doing is contributing to self-hatred, depression, and psychological scars that traumatize the marginalized groups of our society. But I won't. I don't think there's any question about all those things and plenty of other people will discuss them.

The only thing I want to make sure people get is the fact that some Baptists think something different. In fact a whole lot of CHRISTIANS think and believe something completely different: God's messy technicolor creation requires human engagement and when that happens, it is rendered even more beautiful. The world is a richer more wonderful place because of difference, and I for one, welcome it.

Let's Talk About Sex!

Big Stuck #3 - Sex and the Church

Big Stuck #2 - Homosexuality

Everyone's least favorite subject, and therefore all the more pressing!!!